Bend with the wind

‘Life is a Series of Storms’

Be 

flexible …

            Sway and
            bend with 

           the wind.

  

Have 

faith …

 Rely on deep

roots to keep 

you stand-

ing  strong.

 Let it 

go …

Allow the 

storm to 

pass,enjoy 

the present.

 

Forgive …

You deserve 

the peace 

it brings.

 Whenever I get hit by a tornado, hurricane or just strong winds,  I try to visualize myself as a palm tree. No matter how hard the wind blows it remains rooted for another sunny day.  Everything passes, as long as you let it go.  Resentment, anger and disappointment that remains on your horizon are going to create cloudiness and prevent the storm from passing by.  Forgive, even if the person does not deserve it, because you deserve the peace it brings.

Formula for Happiness

Where science meets spirituality there is a formula for happiness.  Deepak Chopra, in his book, "The Ultimate Happiness Prescription", sets forth a formula for happiness.  Happiness = Set Point, (S) + Conditions of Living, (C) + Voluntary Activities, (V).  When I read this, I immediately connected to the idea of a formula for happiness, being a logical left-brain thinker.  Wow...can I really achieve happiness using a formula?  Well, as I read on, it gets more complicated, but still I can totally relate to the concept.

My sister and I in Bali - it took much cognitive therapy to find this waterfall, negative thoughts,"we're on the wrong trail", had to be overcome, pushed aside, to yes, achieve happiness through this personal pleasure!

Set Point, (S), is your state of mind and is said to account for 40% of your overall happiness. You begin life with a set point that is genetically predisposed, you may have more or less tendency toward happiness.  You can alter this point with drugs, meditation or cognitive therapy. Drugs are a quick, short-term alteration that have many side effects.  Unfortunately drugs is the choice that some people make, I guess because it is an easy quick fix.  Taking the time and effort to work through the other methods, meditation and cognitive therapy, will result in a long-term adjustment to your set point. 

Meditation is quieting your mind and going inward.  It does not have to be a formal sit-down exercise, it could be simply taking the time to yourself, to clear the cob-webs and re-boot.  Meditation activates the pre-frontal cortex stimulating the release of naturally occurring brain chemicals.  These brain chemicals, dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and opiates have been linked to different aspects of happiness.  "No single drug can simultaneously choreograph the coordinated release of all these chemicals." (The Ultimate Happiness Prescription)

Cognitive therapy refers re-programming your brain by changing your limiting beliefs.  Start to think and perceive in positive tones.  Is the glass half empty or half full?  Attack negative thoughts by finding something positive, or just let them go.  Believe in yourself, adjust the story in  your head to a more positive plot.

Playstation in Bali -  Happiness is on everyone's face in Bali!

Conditions of Living, the second factor in the formula for happiness, is an easy one to understand.  It is where a lot of people spend their time and effort and is of the least importance.  It accounts for only 10% of your overall happiness.  It is your quality of life, your surroundings, basically the material world.  Money doesn't buy happiness, but it sure helps!  This old saying that everyone has heard repeated many times, holds true in this formula. 

My creative expression of Venice Beach, Bali.

Voluntary Activities, (v), are the choices we make every moment of every day of our lives.  Action to bring personal pleasure, creative expression or happiness to others are said to account for up to 50% of our overall happiness.  Personal pleasure is anything we choose to do that brings us pleasure.  Going to the movies, traveling, walking in the forest, snorkeling, playing a sport.  Creative expression is an activity that is purely for the purpose of expressing your creative side.  Bringing happiness to others is any action that is self-less and is said to be the longest lasting form of happiness. 
Suffering is the counterpart to happiness, it is part of life.  The key is to adapt and find a way back to happiness and not dwell on your suffering.  Let go of the "woe is me" attitude as quickly as possible and return to the formula for happiness.
H =  40% S +  10% C +  50% V
"As Darwin said, the most important factor in survival is neither intelligence nor strength, but adaptability."

 

Reactions become habitual

Why do our reactions feel as though they are out of our control?  We talk to our self after an unfavorable reaction, saying that we will not react that way if this happens again.  Yet, out it pops just the same, as though you have no control over your mind.  Your mind has stored all the reactions that you have experienced in the past and even though you do not want to repeat them, they are what surfaces when your buttons are pushed.  This is habitual.  Your mind reacts as it has done in the past, it doesn't take the time to consider the consequences.  Your mind goes into auto-pilot and before you have a chance to change your reaction it has already happened.

Start by creating a gap; some time between an event and your reaction. This will give you a chance to break the habitual reaction.  There is a calm that is deep within.  You need to go to that place before you react. Journey to your soul and control your reactions.   The longer the gap, the better, but even five minutes will help you to react in a new way.  Longer gaps have an amazing effect, sometimes the problem solves itself or doesn't seem that important any more.  You can save yourself a lot of stress, if you simply take some time to find clarity and your place in the situation.

Amed, Bali

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Be True to Yourself

Life has a way of taking over our genuine self.  The path we choose can manipulate our character in a way that has us fooled into believing we are the actor that we become.  So well trained that we don't even realize that we're acting a part not aligned with our purpose.
This development happens gradually over many years, creating a false self, step-by-step. Each step insignificant in and of itself, but taken as a whole becomes hard to distinguish between your real values and those that have been incorporated to allow this creation to exist.

Why does this happen?  The need to survive is the beginning; making money to live day-by-day.  Once you have enough money for the basics, more perceived needs appear.  Your ego tricks you into believing that you need more stuff, more power, more of anything.  The problem is that there is never enough, as your ego needs to be fed more and more, you adapt to fit the path created by your ego.  Before you know it, you are unhappy but have no idea why?  You are so deep into this new character that you cannot find your real self.
 
To begin your journey visit:  Journey-to-Your-Soul, by Barb Aasen http://www.facebook.com/pages/Journey-to-Your-Soul/309370042492468 

There is so much evidence of these characters in society as people sacrifice their soul for the all mighty dollar, the external power.  Materialism has crept into all segments of society, taking away the joy that is meant to be associated with the celebrations.  Life should be a series of celebrations.  Find something to celebrate today, the air you breath, the trees, the birds, the clean water available.  Just be aware of all you have, take time to silently be grateful and see if you can begin a path to your true self. 

Compassion

"Try being me for a day," is a common cry for help.  This is where compassion can play a role and you can help others with their struggles.  Compassion is not sympathy, it is not feeling sorry for the person.  It is understanding through listening without judgement or criticism.  It is trying to place yourself in their shoes, feel what they are feeling so that you can help them, help themselves.
The first step is to be aware of the other person's difficulties, perceived limitations, or obstacles and try to imagine yourself in their position.  Find something similar in your life that you have experienced and relate that feeling to their situation. Do not verbalize this comparison, send it to your heart and try to just feel what they feel and then just listen.
Throw out thoughts of what you would have done, what they should have done or what you would do now.  This is not about YOU!

   This is about the other person.  Focus on their words, ask questions that will help them understand and feel better.  Take them out of the clouds and down to earth with a form of clarity that they develop.  This may be simply listening while they make sense out of the situation by talking it through, or you may find openings to ask neutral, non-judgmental questions.

Practice compassion as often as you can.  At first you may only get through one step before your thoughts take over and you react from your own perspective.  Practice will allow you to get better at remaining totally focused on the other person and their feelings.
Compassion heals others and will bring you peace.

Let go and stop worrying!

Find peace now;  let go of the past and stop worrying about the future. Worrying only attracts what we don't want. Do the best you can each moment and enjoy the experience.  Refrain from judgment.  Do not label your experiences as good or bad, simply allow them to be.  You don't need to mentally repeat the experience to remember the next time whether or not you would make the same choice.  Let it go ... your mind will be clear and ready to make the next choice! 

 Dr. Wayne Dyer, my favorite inspirational writer, wrote this in his book ~ Wisdom of the Ages: 

"Try to be less rational and intellectual about your life and how you organize it.  Let go of your mental inclinations to compute and just allow yourself to be and to be pulled by that future pull that is the source of life.  And by the way, enjoy the luscious watermelon, rather than attempting to understand it."

The sun rises everyday, giving you a new opportunity to enjoy life's experiences.  Let go and enjoy the new day!

Trust

Having faith is a big leap for many people.  They conjure up the worst case scenario, imagining what might happen and then try to insurance against all possibilities.  Don't get me wrong, I am not advocating a reckless approach to life, there is a need for insurance and having a cautious, prudent outlook in life is a balancing act. Like many things in life we must choose the risks we are willing to take.  I just feel that we have gone overboard, trying to ensure that every possibility is covered.  The thing is, life is full of surprises and some of them although not welcomed initially, may be exactly what we need.

Fearless and carefree!  Do you remember when you were in your early 20's and risks were taken on with enthusiasm?  I completely trusted the  universe to deliver.  I had no doubt that things would work out for the best; if a job was lost, well that was because there was a better one on the way.  I vividly remember the feeling and it was joyous and full of hope.
Apparently the brain is not fully developed until around age twenty-five; the part of the brain that gives us caution and stops us from acting without consideration for the risks.  That being said, we may have acted without thinking, but we must be careful that we don't spend our lives thinking without acting or or we really will never live at all.

Start small, assume the best, trust in the next moment in your life.  Try it on, see how it feels. Build on it each day,  until you  return to the spiritual security that we have totally lost while being consumed with economic security.